The Mancrushes of May

It’s been quite a rough month for the Rockies, but that hasn’t stopped the burning heteropassion in Rockiescast’s heart.  Not only are all of May’s mancrushes Rockies, but there’s just one newcomer to this season’s crush list.  Meanwhile, it looks like Rockiescast is headed toward long-term manfatuations with its other crushes this month.

4/28-5/4; 5/19-5/25

The Man: Aaron Cook, SP, Colorado Rockies

The Crush: Aaron Cook’s dazzling finish to April/start to May made him this season’s first 2-time mancrush and first repeat mancrush.  When a teammate joined him on the 2-time mancrush roster later in the month, Cookie responded with a complete game 4-hitter and became the season’s first 3-time mancrush despite suffering a loss earlier in the week.  In the four starts during Cook’s two May mancrush weeks, he logged 30 2/3 innings, allowing 7 earned runs, striking out 11 while walking ONLY 3!  Surprisingly, Cookie gave up 33 hits in those four starts, but Rockiescast will take hits over walks any day…especially when the hits come with a 3-1 record and a 2.05 ERA.

5/5-5/11

The Man: Chris Iannetta, C-3B, Colorado Rockies

The Crush: Oddly enough, it only took until the first full week in May for Rockiescast to pick up its second backup catcher mancrushof the season.  For this one week, however, Chris Iannetta was anything but a backup.  Iannetta picked up five starts in the seven games during this span, and hoooeey! did he ever take advantage of the opportunity.  He went 7-for-19 in the batter’s box, driving in 7 runs.  Iannetta’s 7 hits included 2 doubles, a triple, and a home run.  He managed to hit for the cycle over a three-day stretch.  That counts for something, right?  Whatever.  Rockiescast isn’t ashamed to admit that the bias toward homegrown talent (aka: the Barmes Effect) leads to some Iannetta favoritism, but it wasn’t a factor in this week’s mancrush.  Chris earned the honors the old-fashioned way: menacing others with a bat.

5/13-5/18

The Man: Clint Barmes, 2B-SS, Colorado Rockies

The Crush: Needless to say, Rockiescast’s heart was as wounded as Clint Barmes’ kneeafter it was struck by Jose Reyes’ helmet as the Met over-slid second.  (Learn to slide, jerkface!)  Before that anguish, Barmes was impressing us with his defensive work filling in for an injured Troy Tulowitzkiat shortstop.  Oh yeah, he was also doing a nice job of hitting baseballs with a bat.  Barmes was one of the Rockies’ most reliable hitters when he was healthy, and his May mancrush week was no exception.  He collected 10 hits in 22 at-bats over the week, good for a .455 batting average.  Clint also managed to hit for the cycle over the span of the 3-game Twins series.  (Sorry, it’s the Barmes Effect at work again…or as Clint calls it: the Effect.)  Regardless, Rockies fans everywhere owe Barmes a debt of gratitude for his contributions so far this season.  Maybe we can all chip in to buy him a new knee.