Posts tagged ‘Todd Helton’

The Denver Post published some thoughtful and some misleading baseball opinions on Sunday coming from the usual sources.

On the thoughtful side, I really liked Troy Renck’s observations on the Jon Miller/humidor conspiracy theory. If you missed Miller’s comments, which have generated some angry responses around Colorado, here’s a quick summary: The Giants’ radio man claimed that there’s a conspiracy brewing around baseball regarding the Rockies’ recent habit of staging dramatic late inning comebacks at Coors Field.  The theory, which earns the title “hair-brained” because it’s so full of holes, is that the Rockies are somehow secretly switching non-humidor balls into the game to boost their offense when they’re trailing in late innings.

Lots of valid points have been made about why such a conspiracy theory is absurd, but Renck lands a counter-punch to the Giants that I hadn’t seen before.  When voices associated with the San Francisco Giants start raising questions of cheating among their opponents, Renck invokes the name of Barry Bonds.  On the surface it might seem like a low blow to bring up Bonds’ alleged steroid use, but it is a fair point in this situation.  The Giants and their fans maintained their support for Bonds despite a mountain of evidence that he had spent the last half of his career using banned substances to enable his record-shattering offensive production.  By the time Bonds broke Hank Aaron’s hallowed all-time home run record, the baseball world turned away in disgust while the Giants showered Bonds with praise.  It was an ugly moment to witness.  Given that recent chapter in baseball history, it seems hypocritical for an employee of the Giants organization to echo baseless and illogical conspiracies regarding the power numbers put up by a rival team.  Jon Miller is quite possibly my favorite baseball broadcaster anywhere, but I find the loud criticism of his comments to be spot-on, especially the points made by Troy Renck.

On the other hand, Mark Kiszla continues his treasonous cheer-leading for Todd Helton’s quick demise.  This time, Kiz takes a filthy page from cable news, talk radio, and partisan talking heads to hammer away at Helton.  If you’ve ever seen Stephen Colbert interview an elected official, you’ve seen this trick exposed.  The idea is that you phrase a question in a way that your controversial opinion is slipped in as assumed fact.  During the Bush Administration, Colbert would famously ask Democrat interview subjects the loaded question, “George W. Bush: great president or the greatest president?” Kiz pulls this same trick a bit more subtly in his mailbag column by cherry-picking questions that fit into his delusional view that Todd Helton is necessarily washed-up.  The most negative view of Helton offered in the questions sites his declining numbers over the past three seasons.  However, Helton’s numbers support exactly the counter-point that Rockiescast has been arguing forever: when healthy, Todd Helton’s ability to get on base hasn’t declined at all.  Helton’s critics love to look back to 2008 as the point of reference for aging Todd because that’s when his numbers took a dive due to his back problems.  2008 and 2010 don’t look good precisely because Todd was trying to play hurt.  2009, on the other hand, was a healthy year for Todd, and his numbers are consistent with other years in the post-power Todd era.  In fact, Todd was impressive enough in 2009 to finish 13th in MVP voting, his best showing in that vote since 2003.

Then there’s the question that Kiz throws in to represent the opposing view.  Rather than using a question asking about the rationale behind Kiz’s arguments, he picks a question that only lobs personal insults at Kiz and acknowledges Todd’s struggles this season.  This too is an old political trick: include an irrational representation of the opposing view.  This technique gives the impression of fairness to one’s opponents while painting those opponents as angry, irrational lunatics.  And while it is certainly true that Scott and I are angry, irrational lunatics, in this case we are representing the logical point of view.  We don’t know why Mark Kiszla is so anxious to see Todd Helton’s career come to an abrupt end, but we will continue to call him out on his flawed arguments.  Kiz: you remain On Notice.

… to the organization, Kaz Matsui. Kaz agreed to a minor-league deal with the club.

… to the majors, Chris Iannetta. Chris has rediscovered his stroke, hitting .349 with 5 homers since being sent down to the Springs.

… Tulo’s power stroke - four homers in the last 5 games.

… to pitching baseballs, Huston Street. Huston threw a 20-pitch bullpen session, his first pitches since tweaking his groin in a rehab start for Tulsa.

… to the Rockies +.500 record.

… clueless local columnists making nonsensical arguments for why Todd Helton is washed up. More on (or perhaps moron) this during the next cast.

… Rockiescast references to Welcome Back, Kotter - the greatest show in the history of television.

We’re sorry we  couldn’t get this up sooner, but better late than never.  Awesome job Eric, Dave, Burke, and Clay. We declare you the National League Lego Champions of 2007!

With last night’s awesome win, the Rox are 20 game above .500 for the first time in franchise history.  This will not be surprising to you if you already knew that coming into this game the Rox were at 19 games above .500 for the first time in franchise history.

Is it just me, or was Mr. Late Night doing his Todd Helton impression in that last at bat?  High-pressure situation, fouling off a lot of pitches with 2 strikes, finally putting the ball in play in just the right spot to win the game.  Six inches to the right and Brandon Phillips makes the play and the Rockies lose.

Joe Beimel should buy Matt Daley dinner, or maybe carry around his pink backpack for a week, for bailing him out last night.  A veteran pitcher should not come into the game, walk a guy on four pitches, and then rely on a rookie to get out of the jam.  Fortunately, Matt Daley is awesome.  I see a direct correlation between Beimel’s poor performance and his unfortunate lack of beard.

During the post-game interview with Smith, Spilly got him with a shaving cream pie to the face.  Sure it was funny, but Spilly should not be allowed anywhere near shaving cream until he grows his beard back.

Right after that happened, Alanna Rizzo totally ratted Spilly out.  Not cool Alanna.

I knew all along that the winning run in this game would be scored by Jason Marquis.  I swear.

If people can be awarded honorary degrees from universities, I see no reason why we can’t award Jason Hammel an honorary win for last night’s game.  I think I like him more and more every time he pitches.

Too bad Yorvit’s streak ahd to end, but at least it didn’t end ten days ago like I would have expected.

Thank you Ramon Troncoso.  The Dodger’s reliever started the 9th inning with a throwing error, allowing the lead-off man to get two second.  One sac bunt and two intentional walks later, the bases were loaded for Mark Reynolds.  Troncos proceeded to walk Reynolds to lose the game, bringing the Rox to within 2 1/2 games of the Dodgers.

Scott and I had a tough time picking this Beard of the Month. We had listener suggestions for two different beards, both making very strong cases for their respective candidates. Well, I suppose the beards made strong cases for themselves, but the suggestions translated the awesome-beardness into words very effectively. Lauren suggested Todd Helton on the merits of his recent efforts to grow his trademark mountain man goatee into a full mountain man beard. Meredith suggested Chad Gaudin for the Lincolnesque chinstrap he featured throughout the month of July. All else being equal, Rockiescast obviously would prefer Todd to Chad. We have very strong feelings about Todd. That’s nothing new.

What was new, however, was Todd’s full beard.  This ended up being the kicker. At month’s end, Todd’s beard status was somewhat ambiguous.  From afar, he looked to have an impressive mountain man beard engulfing his face. But up close (our favorite Helton vantage point), the patchiness of the cheek areas made it unclear whether Todd was in the process of growing the full beard or Todd was just too lazy to shave for a while (aka: the Beard Marquis).

Gaudin, on the other hand, seemed to maintain his chin beard with the BotM criteria in mind. It was already in full force when the month began, and Chad maintained a consistent look throughout the month. Then the calendar page flipped to August, and suddenly he was back to just a goatee. So Chad Gaudin’s beard was just a special July treat for baseball fans. And while it was here, it was indeed Special. Meredith was pretty accurate with her comparison of Gaudin’s beard to Abraham Lincoln’s. What really struck me though was Gaudin’s resemblance to Dwight’s cousin Mose from The Office. Take a look at the pictures accompanying this post and see if you are struck in the same fashion. Also, note how much more intimidating the Padres would be if they changed their name to the San Diego Fear! As an added bonus to the whole situation, Gaudin’s beard is red. While this always scores bonus beard points in my book, it serves a fantastic nickname purpose here. Combine the color of Gaudin’s beard with his resemblance to Mose, and voila…You’ve got Flaming Mose!

Is it just me or do happy tacos seem even happier when they come at the Phillies expense? 

If the Rox were able to sweep the Phillies, which would include taking games against Cliff Lee and J.A. Happ, will the sports media finally stop ignoring the Rox as legit playoff contenders?

When will Woody Paige start ignoring the Rockies so I don’t have to read/listen to him ever again.

Garrett Atkins is now 6-14 (.429) with 1 2B, 3 HR, 5 R, 8 RBI in 4 games vs the Phillies this season.

Todd Helton should stop shaving for the remainder of the season.

Ian (a regular Purple Row commenter), Scott (me), Meredith (loyal Rockiescast listener, knitter extraordinaire), Russ (Purple Row moderator) at Citi Field just after the game got called for rain on Wednesday night.

Hit my 500th double and I didn’t even need to slide

So I joined a club with 49 other guys
Then I hit me a homer and the Rox won again
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Do you don’t you want me to beat you
Throw me a fastball and my bat will defeat you
Throw me, throw me, throw me, c’mon throw me a fastball
and I’ll hit one over the right-center-field wall

Helton skelton
Helton skelton
Helton skelton, yeah

Will you won’t you want me to beat you
Threw a two and one fastball then you watched as the ball flew
Throw me, throw me, throw me, c’mon throw me a fastball
and I will hit one over the right-center-field wall

Look out
Helton skelton
Helton skelton
Helton skelton, yeah
Look out cuz here I come

(Marquis) No more blisters on my fingers!

When he rolls up his sleeves
He ain’t just putting on the ritz 

Our Todd is an awesome Todd

There’s thunder in his footsteps
Purple lightning in his fists

Our Todd is an awesome Todd

The mighty Todd was born
In Knoxville, Tennessee
And it wasn’t for no reason
That he earned my love
Cheap tacos are always close
When Todd is in the lineup because
Our Todd is an awesome Todd

Our Todd is an awesome Todd
A man who I’m in awe of
With wisdom, power and glove
Our Todd is an awesome Todd

And when the game was scoreless
And was void of a hit

Our Todd is an awesome Todd

He got hurt playing football
Now everything’s alright

Our Todd is an awesome Todd

Power and contact
he poured out on the pitchers
Patience and keen eye, finds his way on base
I hope that you have not
Too quickly forgotten that
Our Todd is an awesome Todd

Our Todd is an awesome Todd
A man who I’m in awe of
With wisdom, power and glove
Our Todd is an awesome Todd

Who knows what tomorrow brings

In a game, few streaks survive
All I know, is the way I feel
Seems surreal, Todd keeps it alive

The season’s long
There are Dodgers in our way
But now it seems we win every day

Todd lift us up where we belong
Made the Pirates cry

On a mountain high

Todd lift us up where we belong

With Bradley and Tulo

Lets take down the Halos